Finally a new post

Okay, this post is for my sister Tina who thinks I don't blog enough.

So....I own a pole dancing studio right? Right.
Women take pole dancing lessons right? Right.

Well, this one particular woman decided that she wanted to take her new skills to a more professional level....amature exotic dancing. So she decided to pick her birthday to do such a thing. I marked the date on the calendar...found a baby sitter...and invited my husband to go along for the ride.

So last night, we went to go see my student do amature night. I know 90% of the strippers who work there, so it wasn't a surprise that my husband was wanting to be introduced to all of the girls.

Anyway, it was "Paradise's" turn to dance (that was the stage name she gave herself). Keep in mind, she's a very large woman with cellulite, stretch marks and saggy boobs. But, strip clubs have this magical thing called a "black light". It erases everything.

So she performed...it was kind of terrible. She was moving way too fast and kept doing the same three moves over and over. It seemed like the song would never end. Her husband was there to support her...she mainly danced for him. She didn't take off any clothes. She was actually very covered up.

After she danced, all the dancers talked me into going to the back room to "talk". They tried to talk me into doing amature night too because one of the dancers had split her foot open on one of those magical "black lights". So there were only four girls left to work the whole night...forcing each dancer to dance every four minutes or so. So, the more dancers and amatures they had...the better.

While trying to talk me into dancing, they showed me cute costumes, gave me a stage name "pixie" ( I have short hair). They even explained the rules:

1. Don't grab your ass
2. Don't come within four inches of your vagina
3. Don't reach off the stage for a dollar bill
4. Don't grab your breasts
5. Don't take your clothes off (amatures must dance fully clothed)

These sounded like pretty reasonable rules. I wouldn't have to take off any clothing, I wouldn't have to touch myself...just show off my pole moves. But, in the end, I didn't dance...or did I?

There you go Tina. Let your mind wander :)